Day 336: Paula Creamer's Amazing Putt.

So it's March. This is officially the time when I start to really hate winter. This is when I cry, uncle! and declare my utter hatred for being cold. I'm over dressing in layers every day to combat the frigid temperatures, I'm over paying buckets to heat my house, and I'm over tiptoeing around my driveway so I don't crack my skull open on the ice. And despite my hatred for hot weather, I'm longing for spring and green grass right now.

Plus, I'm excited to play golf. Wait, scratch that—I'm totally pumped to play golf. I've got my sights on a brand new golf bag and some snazzy new kicks and I'm ready to hit the links. I'm not sure why I'm so excited. It's not like I magically got awesome over the winter. Although in my head, I've gained 30 yards on my drive and my short game is unstoppable. But what's in my head and what actually happens on the course are two completely different animals. I might still suck but I'm going to look good doing it!

Now here's something that will get you giddy about playing! It's been a long time since LPGA star, Paula Creamer, has won a tournament—not since the 2010 U.S. Women's Open. She has played in 79 tournaments since then and finally won this weekend in Singapore. But how she won was a thing of beauty. In a playoff, she drained an ugly, hilly 75-foot putt to take the top prize.

Now I'm pretty realistic in my golfing abilities and making a putt that long, under those circumstance, will never happen to me. But oh my, even if it did and I wasn't playing for the top prize on the pro tour, it would be a-friggin-mazing! And I would be talking about it for the rest of my life!

Day 335: Baseball's Opening Day a National Holiday? Yes, Please!

Baseball is the one sport where its Opening Day always seems fall on a weekday and the games are played in the afternoon—you know, when people are at work and kids are at school. So naturally, that day sees in an increase in workplace sickness and kiddos playing parent-approved hooky. Because seriously, who doesn't want to be at the ballpark on a crisp spring day in April?

It's a true sign that spring has sprung and summer is fast on its heels. The pomp and circumstance of Opening Day, the buzz of a ballpark, the sights, the sounds, the smell of popcorn and hotdogs. And how do they get the grass so green so early in April? It's a special day that deserves special recognition.

Baseball is America's Pastime. What would be more friggin' patriotic than if Opening Day was a national holiday? Well, Budweiser (now officially my new favorite beer for their part in this) launched an ad campaign featuring Hall of Fame shortstop, Ozzie Smith to get people to sign the petition. All we need is 100,000 signatures by March 26th. I would even be willing to trade in a holiday to make this happen. Take back Patriots Day and give us Opening Day. It's even in the same month!!

If that video doesn't get you pumped for calling in sick on Opening Day, I don't know what will.

Just think, no more having to make up some lame sickness in order to get the day off—even if you're not going to make it to the actual ballpark and you're just planning to sit on your couch and watch the game. And then you feel bad the next day when people ask how you're feeling and you have to come up with a reason why you're miraculously better the next day. *cough* Not that I've ever done this before, so I'm only assuming this is what happens. *cough*

CLICK HERE TO SIGN THE PETITION TO MAKE OPENING DAY A NATIONAL HOLIDAY!! Doooooooooooo it!! All the cool kids are signing!

Day 334: Dogs Like Balls of All Sizes

It's Friday... it's been an inordinately long week and I'm exhausted. I'm sure you're all pretty beat too and don't really need a long, thought provoking blog post tonight. You're probably hoping for some mindless video with cute animals. Well, since my brain has punched out for the weekend and refuses to form intelligent thoughts about sports, you might just be in luck.

My brain doesn't even give a shit that the Red Sox played the Twins in their first official Grapefruit League game today. Nor does it care that, despite losing 8-2, there were some bright spots like Bryce Brentz going yard and Mike Napoli going 2-for-2 and Anthony Renaudo pitching two innings of no hit ball. To put it simply, my brain has mutinied. It has extended the proverbial middle finger and skipped town. My brain is an asshole.

What my brain does care about is cute dogs and videos about cute dogs playing sports. Cute dogs don't take much actual thought or intelligence. All cute dogs require is for the brain to tell the mouth to make the sound, awwwwww. That's about the extent of what my brain is capable of right now.

 

Seriously? Why have my hounds never shown this kind of talent? I get stuck with dogs who chase their own tails, sleep 22 hours a day and eat poop. I got cheated! TGIF!

Day 333: Former Red Sox Players Making Spring Training News

Well, spring training play has officially begun with the Red Sox taking on Northeastern University and Boston College in a split-squad double header Thursday afternoon. The won the both contests 5-2. These games always make me nervous because, holy crap, what if they lose to a bunch of college kids? They start playing kids their own age tomorrow when they take on the Minnesota Twins at 1:05pm.

A couple of former Red Sox players made some headlines today in games of their own. Remember Josh Reddick? I always liked that guy and I was a little sad when the Red Sox traded him to the Oakland A's for pitcher Andrew Bailey and outfielder Ryan Sweeney. It was a great trade... for the A's. Reddick also lucked out by managing to get out of town before the 2012 Bobby Valentine disaster. Bailey has been riddled with injuries, missing a lot of 2012 and really not doing anything special otherwise. Sweeney... I barely remember him. He spent just the 2012 season with the Sox.

Reddick has two solid seasons under his belt with Oakland and in 2012, hit a career high (by a lot) 32 home runs. But his offense is what truly stands out for this 27-year-old—he won a Gold Glove in '12 for his play in right field. And today, in a spring training game against the San Francisco Giants, he had not one, but two amazing catches to rob Mike Morse of home runs both times. Reddick scaled the outfield fence to make the spectacular catches and many say they've never seen anything like it.

Wanna see? It's worth the time. At first I thought they were just replaying the catch and then I realized it wasn't a replay, he just did it again! Click HERE for the video.

The other headline making former player is Carl Crawford who now plays for the LA Dodgers. I hate this guy. Even when he played for the Red Sox, I thought he was a whiny bitch. So it's fun to see him do stuff that makes him look even more douchey than he already is. He was attempting to steal a base but the ball was hit foul. In the meantime, he had already slid into second base in a rather awkward way. It appeared he belly-flopped his way to second and in the process smacked his chin on the ground which in turn sent his helmet flying off his head. And it was all for naught because it was a foul ball. It's not as exciting as Reddick's catch, but you can see the video HERE. It's good for a giggle.

I seriously don't miss that guy even one little speck, or the guys that were shipped off to LA with him. If that crew was still around last season, I don't think they win the World Series. I know... bold statement but there's something to be said about team chemistry and getting along. Crawford and Adrian Gonzalez and Josh Beckett did not play well with others. But I digress... (and I'm guessing you're nodding your heads in agreement at my digression?)

Day 332: Aaron Hernandez: Suspected Murderer and Jailhouse Bully

I'm patiently waiting for a male version of Orange is the New Black starring former New England Patriots' wide receiver and current murder suspect and jailhouse bully, Aaron Hernandez. Can someone tell me if that's in the works? It's been a long time since I've written anything about this A#1 dumbass. In case you have forgotten, the 24-year-old former Patriots' rising star with a $41 million contract was arrested in June and charged with murdering his so-called friend, Odin Lloyd. (I'd hate to see how he treats his enemies!)

We haven't heard much about Hernandez since he was incarcerated. Some mumblings here and there about what types of food he eats... if he was allowed to watch the NFL... how he's coping without the interwebs. You know, nothing too gripping. He seemed to be living a pretty uneventful and lonely existence. Hernandez has been kept from the general population and spends his time in the Bristol County Jail's solitary confinement. Booooo-ring. Supposedly it's for his own protection with some of the higher ups feeling like maybe this former NFL star might be seen as a "prize" by some of the other inmates.

So the other day he was allowed a little exercise in the hallway and happened upon a fellow inmate who had evidently been previously harassing Hernandez who took offense and apparently beat the living shit out of the instigator. It was stopped pretty quickly and neither inmate required medical attention although both will face discipline or criminal charges. This is an interesting turn of events considering that only one prisoner is supposed to be out of his cell at a time... so why was this guy out too? Sounds a bit fishy to me.

I know on the scale of prison scuffles, this one registers pretty low on the Richter scale, but my imagination had this ruckus reaching the heart-pounding levels of, say, a Sons-of-Anarchy-gang-Opie-beating so violent it could make you lose your lunch. But then I remembered this isn't television. Although I do wonder if anyone got that melee on video... {{runs to YouTube}} Shoot, no grainy cell phone videos posted.

Here's my feeling on this ordeal... Hernandez pleaded not guilty to the murder charge. Understandable since there still no murder weapon. But if you're truly innocent, wouldn't you do your best to keep your head down and be on your best behavior? But if you're really guilty, what's a measly assault charge on top of murder one? Chew on that for a while...

Day 331: Baseball for Beginners: Lesson #6 - Some Basic Rules

Ok, fans-to-be, so far Baseball for Beginners has covered the following areas: Pitchers, Catchers, Infielders, Outfielders and the Lineup. Be sure to catch up if you've missed any of the previous lessons. This week's lecture is going to cover a few basic rules that make you sound well-versed in the game of baseball even if you still don't fully understand the game.

The game of baseball is played between two teams who alternate between offense and defense. There are nine innings in a game and each inning is divided in half—each team gets three outs per half inning. The top of the inning is when the visiting team hits and the home team plays the field and then vice versa in the bottom of the inning. Each team fields nine players and the ultimate goal is to score more runs than the other team. A run is scored when a player runs completely around the bases back to home plate. The bases are 90 feet apart on the infield which is shaped like a diamond—what's not to like about this sport?

As with most sports, baseball has specific equipment that is used. When playing the field (defense), a glove is worn to catch the ball on the non-throwing hand. The baseball is roughly three inches in diameter and there's something beautiful about the stark whiteness of the leather covering with the red stitching. The offense uses a bat to hit the ball which, at the major league level, can only be made of wood—most often ash is used.

On offense, each team's batting order (the lineup) gets their turn at the plate to try and get on base. If the batter hits the ball into the field of play, they run to first base and beyond if they can get there without getting out. If a batter gets three strikes (a swing and a miss or a called strike by the umpire), they're called out. On the other hand, if there are four balls (a pitch not in the strike zone), that batter automatically takes first base. If the batter hits the ball over the outfield fence in fair territory, it's a home run and the batter can circle all four bases.

On defense, there are several ways the team can get an opposing player out. The pitcher can strike out the batter (which is the most fun way as far as I'm concerned!) There are force outs which occur when, after the ball is hit, the defensive player with the ball reaches the base before the runner. Fly outs generally happen in the outfield when the batter hits a fly ball that is caught before the ball hits the ground. Or the runner can be tagged out when the defensive player just touches that runner with the ball (or the glove with the ball in it.)

Baseball is the perfect sport for a lazy, hot summer day. The pace of the game is generally slower than most sports and, maybe this is what I love so much about it, it doesn't require your full attention every second of the game.

Day 330: Boston Bruins Find Success in Sochi

After a two and a half week break from their regular schedule for Winter Olympics action, the NHL teams are ready to get back into action this week. The Boston Bruins will travel to Buffalo on Wednesday night to play the Sabres. The B's had five players join their home countries for the Olympics in Sochi and three of those guys came home newly crowned medal winners.

Team Canada won the gold medal with impressive shutout wins over Team USA to make it to the gold medal game, and then a 3-0 win over Team Sweden to take the top prize. Patrice Bergeron stood atop the podium with his countrymen to collect his medal. When the Olympics began, Bergeron was a part of the fourth line for the Canadian team. But just like with his regular season play, he was so effective every time he stepped on the ice, he was moved to the top line with Sidney Crosby and Chris Kunitz. Stats: Six games, two assists, plus-4, 16 shots on goal, 13:57 time on ice per game, 31-for-49 on face-offs (63 percent).

Team Sweden finished second in men's hockey taking home the silver medal after losing to Team Canada. Bruins winger Loui Eriksson, who has been slowed by injuries this year, came through for his country. He was a member of the top line playing with Nicklas Backstrom and Daniel Sedin and he ended up scoring a big goal in the semifinal game against Finland that tied the game, ultimately leading the way for a 2-1 Sweden win. Stats: Six games, two goals, one assist, 11 shots on goal, 19:01 time on ice per game.

Tuukka Rask played a huge role in Finland's path to the bronze medal including a big shutout over the luckless Team USA to ensure a spot on the podium. Although Rask got off to a shaky start in the Olympics, he soon settled down and went on to post a .938 save percentage. He was especially impressive in the Finland win that knocked Team Russia out of the tournament. Rask ended up getting sick and missing the semifinal game against Sweden so who knows, maybe if he had been in net, Finland would've had a chance to play for gold. Stats: Four games, 3-1, .938 save percentage, 1.73 goals against average.

Zdeno Chara (Slovakia) and David Krejci (Czech Republic) also both played in the Olympic tournament. Neither was really close to contending for a medal but Chara seemed to be quite a celebrity off the ice and had at least one picture taken with a really small person. He was also the tallest flag bearer and had to jimmy-rig his hotel bed to accommodate his 6-9 frame.

So... the Olympics are over... Looks like this is the time where I throw on that pink hat and hop on the Bruins' bandwagon to see what these guys can do down the stretch. I hope it's as exciting as last season! Don't Poke the Bear!