Day 226: Hazing is Stupid.

Over the past week, I haven't been able to turn on sports radio without hearing about Richie Incognito, the bully. Or Jonathan Martin, the bullied. Or the Dolphins and their dysfunctional organization and lack of locker room control. Or the loads of hazing that goes on in football and other sports and organizations.

Despite its prevalence, hazing is a real shitty thing to do to a teammate. The dictionary defines "team" as "a group of players forming one side in a competitive game or sport" or "two or more people working together." How does beating someone up or insulting and threatening their family build positive relationships? Isn't it necessary to have trust and respect for your teammates in order to form a successful and cohesive unit? Where some think that hazing constructs a stronger bond, I beg to differ. Hazing is more likely to make those victims feel threatened and nervous. So how does that person perform to their abilities if the anxiety of what might happen to them if they fail is haunting them?

Colleges are constantly in a battle with fraternities, sororities and sports teams and clubs over hazing its members, and many are forced to face the reality that sometimes these actions end in serious injury, or in some cases, death. According to a University of Maine study, more than half of college students involved in clubs, teams, and organizations experience hazing. This would explain why we hear about it more often than we should.

It's nearly impossible to believe that coaches are not aware of what these students are doing. The UMaine study says hazing has a public aspect, with 25 percent of coaches or organization advisors aware of a group’s hazing behaviors; 25 percent of the behaviors occurring on campus in a public space; in 25 percent of hazing experiences, alumni were present; and students talk with peers or family (26 percent) about their hazing experiences.

As of this week, the NFL has not yet sent any memos regarding the banning of hazing or guidelines for handling incidents. In Bill Belichick's weekly visit with WEEI's Salk and Holley, he weighed in on his feelings on hazing. Honestly, I'm not sure I've ever heard Belichick talk this in depth about any subject... ever. To read the whole conversation, click here. The whole discussion was interesting coming from the view of a very successful coach, but this comment really struck me as a really great synopsis of the whole situation.

"We’re all grown men. We’re all adults. It’s really about relationships, and if the relationship is not working, then somehow it’s up to the people involved in that relationship to either fix it or resolve it or terminate it, whatever it happens to be."

No one should have to live under the fear of hazing. Sure, sometimes there's a rite of passage to becoming part of a team. That rite should not involve violence, extortion or abusive or threatening words.

Day 218: Bullying: It's Not Just for Kids Anymore

When I look back at the World Series Champion Red Sox team, I see a team. I see a group of guys that enjoyed not only playing on the field with each other, but also hanging out off the field. From what I hear, there wasn't a bad apple in the bunch. It was a breath of fresh air after some of the whiny bitches that plagued the clubhouses of past years. So naturally, I figured every professional sports team was all Kumbaya and just nice to each other.

I couldn't have been more wrong. Just this morning I heard a story about a Miami Dolphin tackle, Jonathan Martin. He's a 23-year-old, second year, 304 pound offensive tackle, and he's currently on a leave of absence from football. He's not injured... instead, Martin has been the victim of bullying by a few of his teammates. Huh? Bullying your own teammate? Sounds more asshole-ish than team-ish to me.

According to NFL.com, NFL Media's Albert Breer reported that Martin shared texts and voicemails with his parents this past weekend that he received from one particular teammate. They then turned them over on Sunday to the Dolphins and the league. The evidence implicates guard Richie Incognito, as well as center Mike Pouncey. (Pouncey was recently served a grand jury subpoena relating to the Aaron Hernandez case so clearly he's just a trouble magnet.) Incognito left a voicemail for Martin that used a racial slur and threatened violence. Both the NFL and the Dolphins have heard that message and Incognito was promptly suspended indefinitely pending an investigation.

The disturbing voicemail went a little something like this—I think we can all easily fill in those (expletive) blanks:

"Hey, wassup, you half (expletive) piece of (expletive)," according to a transcript obtained by Breer of an Incognito voice mail to Martin. "I saw you on Twitter, you been training 10 weeks. I'll (expletive) in your (expletive) mouth. I'm gonna slap your (expletive) mouth, I'm gonna slap your real mother across the face (laughter). (Expletive) you, you're still a rookie. I'll kill you."

If that isn't bad enough, there are also reports from the Miami Herald that Incognito threatened and pressured Martin into paying $15,000 for a him and a few teammates to party in Las Vegas. Sadly, it's the part of the Dolphins' locker room "culture" to make rookies and young players to pay for things for the veterans. It's one thing to engage in some light hazing... make the rookies dress up like girls on a road trip or something equally as silly, but forcing players that might not be making the big bucks, to pay for this crap sounds just ridiculous. And for the coaching staff to allow this to happen makes them just as much of the problem.

Here's what I have to say to Richie Incognito... I'm sorry that your penis must be so small that tormenting the younger players is the only way you can feel like a man. Maybe if you stopped acting like a 10-year-old, you're penis would too.